Thursday, August 15, 2013

Disrupting Negative Mind Chatter About Others

There is an individual in my professional life with whom I dislike working and have many disagreements with.  (The details of why aren't important.)

The result for me is that I have an on-going battle with negative mind chatter. Re-hashing a conversation.  Pre-hashing a conversation. Planning out defenses. Anticipating rebuttals.

On the one hand, I hate using my precious time to re-hash/pre-hash conversations of disagreement.  If the conversation sucked the first time around, then it also sucks the second, third, and twentieth time around in my head.

On the other hand, there is a perverse addiction to feeling like I'm in the right or being able to justify exactly how they are wrong -- especially if I held my tongue to be diplomatic during the actual conversation.


Regardless, I want out.  
Life's too short to waste my time in negative mind chatter.  
It is utterly unproductive for me. 

Here is what I've been playing with (it's a little woo but stick with me).

I once read that whenever we are critical or judgmental of someone, we are sending out a cord of our energy and attaching it to them. As long as the cord stays attached, we are actively leaking out some of our energy.

More specifically, the energy cord originates from our solar plexus / gut / core area and it is yellow in color. (Your 3rd Chakra if you know that system.)

I must have sent hundreds of cords out from my core toward person X over the life of this project.  Yikes!

So, whenever I find myself in a negative loop of mind chatter about a conversation with person X, I pause to take a breath. On the inhale, I picture a golden yellow cord of energy returning to my core.  On the exhale I picture that I'm radiating compassion out from my heart  in the form of green light (4th Chakra).  I'm not quite ready to direct my compassion directly toward individual X, so I just send it out to the world in general.

Yes, this practice is kind of hokey for an analytical person like me.  But, I've found it incredibly effective in disrupting my negative mind chatter.  And, I've also found that the mind chatter regarding individual X has been decreasing in frequency.          

Give it a try.  It can't be worse than your negative mind chatter.